Everything............

"For as the waters fill the sea, the whole earth will be filled with an awareness of the glory of God" Habakkuk 3:14

Over the years I have often asked God to show me more of himself in my daily life - I've wanted to see him more, feel him more and somehow know him more in my every day existence - in the ordinary, humdrum day to day routine.

But lately that prayer has changed. There are so many times in the bible where God is present in the mundane and ordinary that I've started to pray less 'God show yourself', and more 'God give me eyes to see, ears to hear and a heart to understand'.

Following God isn't like a mystery treasure hunt or game of hide and seek where God hides himself away, and I have to 'look really really hard' to find him. Why would God hide from me? Actually how could he possibly hide, when every fibre of creation sings of his glory......?

Even if God tried to hide himself, creation, the people in my world and my very being would sing of him every day...... If I am willing to listen.

Because sometimes it almost seems too much to take in.... When I incline myself to see, hear and experience God in the every day it can be like a freight train coming at me. Catching even a tiny glimpse of his heart for me, my world and the people in it can be so breathtaking that it is almost too much to bear - it challenges me at every corner as God speaks, explains and holds me in his amazing the depth and beauty. A glimpse of the heart of God is not without it's challenges, but I wouldn't have it any other way...........


May all our prayers today not be about 'hide and seek' - but all about 'seek and you WILL find'.

Sorry........

It's that film again - no plot spoiler I promise. Just yet another thought provoking line:

"you mustn't be afraid to dream a little bigger"

So why are we so afraid of dreaming big?

"God can do anything you know - far more than anything you could ever imagine or guess, or request in your wildest dreams!"

Ephesians 3:20 the Message

Hmmmmmm.........

Now, this is a bit of a quandary....... I have just seen an amazing film which sparked deep thoughts, but there's a chance that you haven't seen it - so I will need to go carefully........

Inception is a film that seems to provoke two reactions; either 'What?' with a puzzled (or if we're honest, slightly bored looking) face, or 'aaaaamazing' pronounced with at least four exclamation marks and repeated several times......

I have to confess that I am among the latter - on being seated in the Cinema on Saturday night,I was suddenly aware that the muffled ringing of a mobile phone that I could hear was coming from my bag, so I frantically texted the classic 'in the cinema - text me if it's urgent' in reply, fully expecting to text back during a slow movie moment. However, they never got their reply - the film began, and in a matter of seconds I was lost.....

Lost in a mind bending adventure of other worldliness that stretched the imagination, bent the brain and messed with my mind. I can't tell all, as to do so would most certainly spoil the plot for others - but there is one moment that imprinted itself in a 'earth touches divine' kind of way...

A girl experiences something so outside what she believes is possible that it consumes her. Fascinates, teaches, scares and releases a thousand opportunities in one life defining moment. A moment so profound that she knows nothing will ever be the same again. A truly unforgettable moment marked by fear and freedom in equal measure.

So she runs - from the possibility, from the challenge, from the opportunity, from the fear.

And the reaction of the one who introduced her to the moment?

"she'll be back........... reality is not going to be enough for her now"

And so it is - or isn't for me. Once we have experienced things of God - then how can reality - this present earthly reality ever be enough? If one glimpse of the supernatural reality of eternity with the creator of the universe changes everything - then regardless of the pain, regardless of the fear - how can anything else ever be enough?

"Better is one day in your courts, than a thousand elsewhere" Psalm 84:10

"I need Christ - not something that resembles him" C.S Lewis

Here I am.......

We all want things........ Imagine something you really, really want.

Something that you feel would make your life complete, but humanly can never happen for you.

Then imagine that God steps in and promises that he will make the impossible happen, and that he will give you your hearts desire............

But then imagine that it takes 25 years for God to deliver on his promise....... How would you feel? Would you still trust God for those 25 years - or would the doubts of the serpent in the garden of Eden creep in - "did God really say........."?

Then imagine that 12 years or so after delivering on his promise to you - God appears to be about to take away the very thing that you have waited for so long for, the thing that he promised would change the shape of not only your life - but the lives of many generations of people to come..... Then how would you feel? Then would you still trust God - and what would you say to him?

Abraham (who you can read about here) lived most of his life on a journey with God towards a place he didn't know into a future he didn't understand which on a human level didn't make sense. He had to trust God would show him where he was going, and how to get there. Promised a son, but having to wait 25 years for him to be born - then 12 or so years later climbing a mountain having been asked by God to sacrifice that beloved child, Abraham's response when God called his name? "Here I am". Whether said in faith or despair, hope or relief, strength or weakness - Abraham's response was simply 'here I am' - do with me what you will........

broken...........

Ever feel like you are at the end of yourself and there might be nothing left?

I've had one of those times recently...... No big catastrophe, just a series of seemingly small things, that left me feeling weary and lost.

Today I came across this:

"Jesus was broken on the cross. He lived his suffering and death not as an evil to avoid at all costs, but as a mission to embrace. We too are broken. We live with broken bodies, broken hearts, broken minds or broken spirits. We suffer from broken relationships. How can we live our brokenness? Jesus invites us to embrace our brokenness as he embraced the cross and live it as part of our mission. He asks us not to reject our brokenness but accept it and put it under God's blessing. Thus our brokenness can become a gateway to new life......"

Henri Nouwen

And it made sense......

I am broken, others around me are broken - and we're all a bit lost. To live in brokenness together is a hard road to travel. But maybe the only road towards an authentic life.

If we reject our own brokenness then maybe we also reject the brokenness of Jesus - exchanging the cry 'it is finished' for 'it is fine'. We want the brokenness over - he entered into brokenness completely......

To be broken is to be lost. Lost to self sufficiency, lost to individualism, lost to independence. In the greatest paradox, to be lost is the only way to truly be 'found'. Found by love, found by hope, found by freedom. Found by Jesus, by others, by ourselves.

"you are not alone - I'm always there with you

And we'll get lost together, until the light comes pouring through.

It's when you feel like you're done, and the darkness has won.

Babe you're not lost.

And you can't bear the cross. I said Babe you're not lost"

Michael Buble

thin................

I've always been really interested by 'thin places'. The kind of places and times that Sharlande Sledge describes like this "this space, both seen and unseen, where the door between the world and the next is cracked open for a moment, and the light is not all on the other side. God shaped space. Holy".

For many years I have struggled with the fact that I expect Church to be a thin place - but for me it rarely is. Too much crowds in, and too much of me too often gets in the way. But sometimes - and yesterday, was one of those times - the heavens cracked open - and Church became the thinnest of thin places for me. 2 hours of the thinnest line between earth and heaven that opened up an unexpected array of joy, peace, struggle,pain and hope.

The most refreshing of moments - that left me thirstier than ever...........

"in a thin place there is an immediacy of experience where words of faith become words of life..." Sylvia Maddox

looking................

"When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us."
Helen Keller

starry starry night...........

"When I look up at the sky and see the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars you set in place - what are people that you should think about them - mere mortals that you should care about them?" Psalm 8:3-4

I love cold, crisp, starry nights. I'm fortunate to live in a place without too much light pollution, and very often the night sky takes my breath away. Only recently I was so captured by seeing Mars in the sky that my socks froze to the ground - but that's a whole other story..........

Beautiful night skies sing of their creator - the God who mapped out the galaxies, who is responsible for creating matter out of dust. As we gaze at the sky our hearts are moved in awe - but how much greater the awe that the God who created the heavens remembers me - every minute of every day, I am on his mind.

But what should this knowledge bring? More than a fuzzy feeling or a warm glow.... God is so mindful of me - too often God and I are actually mindful of the same thing - me!

How often am I too mindful of me and my cares, and too careless of him and his.............

six............

"Heal me Lord, for my bones are in agony" Psalm 6:2

Sometimes sadness can make us physically ache all over - and it's an ache that only God can deal with. Tears come uninvited and unexplained because life is painful.

But we are not without hope.

In the same way that the writer of this Psalm moves from being "worn out with sobbing" to being sure and certain that "God will answer my prayer", so we can be sure that although life is sometimes very, very sad - our beds are awash with tears and we are worn out - we are never without hope.

We are never without hope because God will answer our prayers.

The Voice of Psalms......

'The Voice of Psalms' is part of a project by Chris Seay and the Ecclesia Bible Society that attempts to 'engage with the Psalms as never before' by producing work that "involves translation and elaboration, but mostly entering into the story of scripture and recreating the event for our culture and time. It doesn't ignore the role of scholar but also values the roles of writers, poets, songwriters and artists".

There is no doubt that this is a beautiful book - both in the interpretative way the Psalms are treated, and in the crafting and style in which the contents are presented. The attractive & high quality internal appearance inside draws the eye, and the reflections are insightful and thoughtfully written - it would make a beautiful gift.

It is important to understand the highly interpretive nature of the book though - which the author makes no attempt to hide - but which may not be understood by a reader new to, or unfamiliar with the Bible. Whilst the lyrical treatment of the individual Psalms is fresh and inspiring, in some places the breadth of interpretation can be challenging: for example the opening verse of Psalm 11 "I trust in the Lord for protection" becomes "I am already in the soft embrace of the Eternal One" - which left me uncomfortable.....

Having said that - if understood as a lyrical reflection 'inspired by scripture' rather than as it claims, 'a bold new translation and format' this is a beautiful book that I suspect I shall find myself returning to more than once to discover more about 'the Eternal One' - although I will still be more comfortable with him as 'the Lord'!

NB: I received a free review copy of this book from Thomas Nelson Publishers as part of their book review blog programme. I received this copy for the purpose of writing a blog review and I was not required to write a positive review - all opinions are my own!